Some past faves before summer break(down)

Hey witches! I wanted to send out one last email before I take a monthlong or so summer break.

I'm kicking the hiatus off with what I've been calling my "midlife crisis trip": hiking for several days with some women I've never met in a far-flung part of Sweden. Pooping in a hole may come into play. I learned about the opportunity while researching an article I worked on about newsletter writers who lead their readers on trips. Something about the brand newness (to me) of the locale, the physical challenge, being in nature, being off devices and being led around by someone else just sounded great to me. Just having something to look forward to that's outside the usual paradigm has been a big lift. I'm a little anxious about so much travel and logistics on my own but I'm also really looking forward to only being responsible to myself for a bit. Even just a long plane ride alone sounds great.

But if you will miss Evil Witches in your inbox I wanted to resurface some past issues that you have told me were some of your favorites, funniest or most helpful from over the years. I'm linking to the Substack version of the issue when people mention the comments section popping off. This makes me realize that even though I moved the newsletter to Ghost I can still maybe post some threads again on Substack in the future (since Ghost doesn't currently host threads although maybe it will soon).

Also, working on this I realized many past Evil Witches posts got imported over to Ghost inelegantly. If you ever see a link that seems funky please let me know so I can make sure it looks good on both platforms. When I get back I'll think about/work on this!

Here you go. Talk to you soon! I'm working on/thinking about some good stuff for when I get back.

• You're not a bad mom if you want to sleep —
  • "The 'internet weirdos don't know better.' I remembered it months later when a real life weirdo was annoying me."
• What are we frantically trying to remember to warn our kids about? —
  • "I have forwarded that one to several friends as well as we hit the middle school era."
• Paid subscriber post: Too many men —
  • "The one about 'too many men' made me feel VERY seen."
  • "It just makes me happy that there's a community of women that just get it."
• Explaining a parent's big illness to kids —
  • "It was very helpful for my cousins," and reading the comments years later "fully reassured me that she and her kids were ok."
• A heart full of sand —
  • "'A heart full of sand' is my all time favorite newsletter. I have forwarded this to so many people."
• Raising kids while sober —
  • "It was the first time I'd heard anyone tell that story from a 'this is addictive and a problem' perspective."
  • "As someone who stopped smoking (a lot of) weed 18 mos ago, the one about your weed journey really resonated with me."
• Should I put my poo in the mail? —
  • "Everyone's responses were so real... it actually made it seem less scary."
  • "I had a bad/stressful spring and summer and the subject alone made me laugh and brightened my day."
• What is perimenopause really like? —
  • "I've dug up from the archives & forwarded/shared at least a few times."
  • On a line about irritability: "may be the result of hormones or may be a reasonable response to all the bs they've put up with for 40-50 years."
• We did Mexico City with a 9 + a 12 year old —
  • "It was hilarious as always, but also practical."
  • "You took a trip I was about to take and had very helpful and specific advice."
• Move over emotional labor: It's cognitive load time! —
  • "The last issue about the cognitive load felt like you read my mind."
  • "My husband and I had a fight subsequently but it was good and productive for both of us."
• Trying to convince your aging parents to get with the program —
  • "It's what made me start a conversation over Marco Polo with my 4 siblings about planning early for our age 75+ parents."
  • "The advice about aging parents was so helpful and made me feel seen."
• Oh, you let your kids watch 'Sesame Street' while you cook dinner? Okay... —
  • "The one about giving kids flour to play with is how I found you and why I made you my friend."
  • "I still think about that dumb guy who told parents to skip screen time and give a toddler a bag of flour. And I loved that everyone was like wut NO."
• FINE —
  • "One that sticks in my mind (because I forwarded it to so many people)... it summed up so many of the annoying things moms deal with while still managing to keep the family running."
  • "That one was SO hilarious and well executed. And it just captured the moment so perfectly!"
• Becoming an expert against your will —
  • "It really hit home! Just needed to read that and know I'm not alone out there."
• Forget about it; it's middle school —
  • "Middle school boys suck — I have one now, but didn't then and it properly girded me."
• A fundraising idea: paying to not. —
  • "I like the ones that warn me away from joining the PTA or school fundraiser committee."
• Good news for people who like trying new things and have a young kid with ADHD —
  • "Your honesty about parenting a kid with ADHD... make me feel seen."
• Subscriber post: Butthurt —
  • "Anything that is about the stuff that absolutely no one will talk about. Ex. butt stuff like hemorrhoids."
  • "I use hemorrhoid cream from the butts issue (the first time)."
• Subscriber-only issue: The case of the disappearing labia — A reader said she was intrigued that there are "still things I don't know about vaginas."
  • "HOW are there still things I don't know about vaginas?"
• Spiteful gifts for kids whose parents you want to troll —
  • "I really like the ones that source input from other witches (like the one for toys for trolling)."
• Don't believe the bedtime hype!!—
  • "I still think 'you're stealing from me!' occasionally :D"
• How some witches talk family alcohol abuse —
  • "My husband is a recovering (recovered?) alcoholic. Almost no one in my life knows and it's not something I can talk about with anyone."
• Pondering if sleep training is bad: Is it bad?—
  • "The sleeping training newsletter literally changed my life."
• One of the worst parts of being an adult — [TW: pet euthanasia]
  • "I think about it often."
• You have permission to... [this is a vintage issue!]—
  • "I loved being told that I don't need to do sports."
• Thread: So nice, you used the same name twice (or more!) —
  • "I recently reread [it] and it made me chuckle."
• Thread: a thing + 1 other thing recipes —
  • "I felt seen AND I had not thought to add an avocado until that point!"
• I'll have what she's having: a vaginal hysterectomy —
  • "I've had issues with continuous bleeding after having my second baby and hearing a similar story made me feel less alone."
• Paid subscriber post: "You're the fucking baby here" —
  • "Can't stop laughing about the time your son wrote a sentence with a swear word in the shower and you were pleased that it had proper grammar."
• The definitive guide to raising preteen girls without letting them get to you —
  • "I was on the cusp of my older kid oozing into preteen life and it felt like you KNEW and sent me just-in-time guidance."
• Take this Thanksgiving plan and shove it! —
  • "I think about it whenever I am tempted to do something out of only obligation that I know will stress me out."
• I feel bad about my induction —
  • "I devoured it... I squirmed, I gasped, I raged."
• Selfish choices —
  • "I have sent it to multiple people after I first read while two months postpartum with my first."

End credits

Thanks for reading Evil Witches, a newsletter for people who happen to be mothers. Since I am going away it feels weird to give you the hard sell but if you read any of the issues above and it makes you want to subscribe for the paid-subscriber-only stuff you can do that here or if you are like "I just want to buy you a meatball while you're in Sweden" you can do that here. Or you can buy a gift subscription for a friend here.

One witchy thing