On working out and not having it suck

Today’s guest issue is brought to you by Dana Schwartz, a writer and single mom living in eastern PA with two kids and a very needy cat. She edits manuscripts and has published stories and essays online and IRL, but took a slight hiatus due to Life.

Let me be perfectly clear: I have never been someone who has maintained a consistent workout routine. In my youth I was an average (at best) “athlete,” partaking in sports mainly to fill up my college applications per my mother’s instructions. Later in my 20s I joined gyms with the best of intentions, and went a bunch of times before petering out and feeling shitty about it.

Basically, working out was never my thing. This didn’t bother me that much because I inherited a relatively lean physique from my father, but eventually came motherhood, aging, gravity, and perimenopause.

But it wasn’t a physical health or vanity related element that got me working out regularly. I’d always known that exercise was the “right thing to do,” but it wasn’t until the one-two sucker punch of divorce and global pandemic did I suddenly feel the need to work out. 

Now, I’m not recommending divorce (or a pandemic) as a means of getting into shape - it could easily have the opposite effect for some - but in the early stressful days of dismantling my 15-year marriage, working out was one of the only things that helped. 

My best friend had filed for divorce within days of me, and it helped having a partner in crime. We worked out together several times a week, running and doing YouTube videos both at the gym and at home, all the while talking shit about the trials and tribulations of our divorces.

For the first time in my life I understood the term “runner’s high.” I loved chasing that euphoric feeling, which helped clear my head during one of the most stressful and painful times of my life. Strategically created playlists with names like Feminist AF and Rage Run kept me going mile after mile. Shitty text from my ex? Upcoming court date? Emotional custody exchange? Running always helped. 

When the pandemic hit and the gyms closed, I shocked myself by becoming an all-season outdoor runner. I ran through winter ice and snow, cold spring rain, and a hot humid summer. Even when the gyms reopened, I didn’t join. Not only because of COVID anxiety, but because I didn’t need it. 

I think the trick to discovering that kind of relationship with exercise is finding the right “why” that gets you to put on the sneakers in the first place, or take them off if you prefer a different kind of workout. 

If you want some inspiration to find your why, watch a video of Ruth Bader Ginsberg working out with her trainer, which she did well into her 80s: