Things I can live without (but choose not to)

Ironically, a don't-buy advisement

Quick announcement: The latest episode of the witch-adjacent podcast “Not Right Now,” hosted with

Quinn Emmett

, is out today! It’s titled “These Rules Can Go To Hell,” a phrase I borrowed from my son when we stopped letting him keep a cup of water in his bedroom overnight.

Onward:

I love the Strategist’s feature “Things [X Person] Can’t Live Without,” and I read it so often that sometimes I start thinking in that format. Many of the topics I’ve been talking about, thinking about, or working on lately are bummer stuff (literally: colonoscopies, but also aging parents, how the internet got to be less fun, and postpartum depression), so today I’m going to talk about things instead. Unlike the Strategist, I don’t get any kickback if you buy any of these items (they’re not affiliate links; I don’t work with any of these brands.)

If you see one of these items and feel compelled to buy them, however, I beseech you to hold off doing so on Friday unless it’s from a local retailer. Reward your restraint by going hog wild on Saturday, of course.

This is getting spread around but I screenshotted it from Erin Spahr

1. A pumice stone.
   I can live with having raggedy nails and dry spots on my knees, but white, cracked feet give me the heebie-jeebies. Maybe it was that dead guy at the Body Worlds exhibit holding his own epidermis with the very distinct calloused foot-skin that made me think, “I want my corpse to have nice soles.” I keep a $5 pumice stone in my shower and use it every shower for just a minute or so, and it works.
   

2. Peet’s Major Dickason’s Blend coffee.
   I wasn’t too choosy about what kind of coffee I drank until my dearly departed friend Amy Krouse Rosenthal made me a perfectly delicious cup of this coffee once at her house before she got sick, and I was like, “I think this is the only kind of coffee I need anymore.” I prefer to get ground because grinding my coffee is just one task too many (and my last bean-grinding coffee maker always clogged, leaked, and broke my heart.)
   

3. 1-liter coffee carafe.

   I’ve pondered just keeping my coffee maker in my bedroom and skipping a step, but this is the next best thing. Every morning, I wake up, go to the kitchen and pour my coffee into this thing so I can have my pot of coffee next to me to refresh my cup while I read or work on the newsletter.
   

4. A composting service.
   This helped my rage issues when it came to my kids’ food waste. I didn’t have it in me to compost at home properly, so I pay this company, Collective Resource, to come to my house once a week and pick up the bucket of compost we left outside and leave behind an empty bucket. Twice a year, we get mulch back if we want it, and I give it to my neighbor who gardens and gives me some of her vegetables, and I feel very saintly.
   

5. Spanx Breast of Both Worlds® Reversible Comfort Bra.
   At a certain point in my life, I realized I didn’t like the feeling of wearing nothing underneath my tee shirt at night. I messed around with various uncomfortable/cheap versions from Target until my friend Evie Nagy told me about this style. They’re $42, so not cheap, but they are well made and have not shown any signs of slowing down after several years. (We did a witches thread on this awhile back about our favorite soft bras if you want extra options.)

6. A big ass measuring bowl.
   I love having an 8-cup measuring bowl for when you need to make sure you’re putting in the right amount of chicken or spinach or broth in your dish, and you don’t feel like filling up a little measuring cup several times. The version I have and like is Pyrex (and it came with its own lid), but apparently, it’s been discontinued: You can find other versions elsewhere.
   

7. 5” x 8’ memo pads.

   I keep to-do lists in various places (see our issue on our various systems here), but for some reason, this is the only size and style with which I can keep my official daily to-do list. Maybe because it’s so portable? Maybe because its small size means it can’t get too unrealistically long? If you get any, just please don’t get them from ULine because they’re evil.
   

8. Mr. Pen correction tape.

   Since I am a little crazy, I sometimes have to reorder or re-approach the to-do list, and crossing things off sometimes just isn’t right if I haven’t earned the privilege of accomplishing them. Mr. Pen saves the day.
   

9. Bombas socks.

   Bombas aren’t cheap, but man, they feel good and last a long time; I have some pairs from 2019 that are still in decent shape. A friend of mine from New Orleans had to evacuate some years ago due to d/t hurricane and told me that she got a pair in her relief package — I was like, “The system works!” I do both ankle and calf-length.
   

10. A very soft feather pillow with a crackly cotton pillowcase.

    Many of us still have some form of a lovey, and this is mine—it’s my comfort pillow for holding, and I do this little twiddly thing with the pillow case… never mind. I’ve taken my soft pillows with me for Lasik surgery, to give birth, on trips. Sadly they don’t last forever. The last one I currently have was $135 from Scandia Down, which seemed like a fortune at the time, but I got it in 2016, so not that bad for something I drag around the house every day. Because I didn’t want to part with it/incur the smell of dry cleaning, I admit I committed the sin of washing it in the washing machine, and the edges exploded, and I tied them off with hair bands. It still does the trick of comforting me.
    

11. Nice soap.

    I resent showering every day. It’s such a hassle. But if I have a big, nice bar of soap, it feels a little bit more like a treat.
    

12. Glasses shaped like cans.

    My husband did some work for a brewery and took home some of these glasses after one of his shoots. I find their shape, with the curved lip at the top, very pleasing to use, and they make me drink more water. (I was going to write an ode to my Sodastream for this piece until I recently realized that maybe too much sparkling water is bad for my tummy. Still processing this information.)
    

13. Shearling-lined Birkenstock clogs.

    When I realized how much money I was saving by giving up a certain vice last year I decided to buy myself a fuzzy Christmas present. They make me happy every time I wear them, and I think, “These were worth it.” They’re like practical, wearable stuffed animals for your feet (but not gross like your kids’ stuffed animals.)
    

14. Not one, but TWO big kitchen knives.

    You ever reach a point in your life when you realize, “Fuck it, I’m a grownup and I have some money — I’m going to buy XYZ?” That was when I realized I could own more than one big chef’s knife so I could enjoy the luxury of having a clean knife ready to go if I was cooking something that might involve, say, both vegetables and raw meat. YOLO. (I use Henckels but you can find some other good knife recommendations in this issue.)

Do you ever think in terms of Strategist lists? What do you put on your imaginary “Cant Won’t live without” list?

---

End credits

Thanks for reading Evil Witches, a newsletter for people who happen to be mothers. Here’s what the newsletter is all about if you’re new to it. The archives live here. I was just talking last night with some friends about this issue on parents who practice ethical non-monogamy so maybe you’d like to see it too.

Issues come out roughly every other week for free subscribers; paid subscribers get:

• additional, more personal-type issues

• access to personal, helpful, funny and fun subscriber chats and threads

• preferred placement in our classifieds issues.

If you want to support this long-term, non-sponsored work and/or get access to the members-only stuff, please:

And if you want to support E.W. but it’s not a good time to pay, please tell a friend about this newsletter or spread the word on your preferred platforms.

---

One witchy thing

ps: Rock n’ Roll Mom, anyone?